Are you sure?
by I hate the computer
Summary: It is the 10th annual Battle City Tournament, and Seto Kaiba invited all the old finalists from the 1st one. That includes his ex-boyfriend Joey Wheeler. They haven't even been in the same room since the break up.
1. Chapter 1

"Are you sure about this, Joey? You really didn't need to come." Yugi asks from the other side of the limo in a tailored suit, his normally out of control hair tamed just for the night. There is slight begging tone to it.

"Rumours can be wrong you know, you never said that you were going." Yami reminds me, also in a tailored suit with his equally out of controlled hair tamed. I smile at their very misplaced concern. It's been five years I broke up with Seto, but this will be the first time we've been in the same room together since then. Since...I can see where their concern stems from, I was complete wreck. Seto invited the finalist of the first battle city tournament for the kick off gala of the 10th annual battle city tournament final. Obviously it would biggest gossip story this month if he didn't invite me. There would be many allocations that he still isn't over me and, of course, he can't have anyone thinking that he isn't a cold heart asshole CEO.

"I'm fine, really. It would cause worst speculation if I didn't come. It's been five years, and I hope that both of us would have grown in those years." I say trying to calm their nerves. They glance at the other and seem to silently agree to let the issue drop. I really do understand where they're coming from; they don't want me to get hurt again. But they don't really understand what went wrong with our relationship.

Lights flash and car slows down. I glance at the mirror once last time, straighten my tie and just take a deep breath. In a minute I'll have to look at Seto in eye, engage in pleasant conversation with him...without bring up anything. Fun times.

"When was the last time you didn't love people paying attention to you? You're a television chef." Yami reminds me before opening the door of the car. I just shake my head at my friend's constant worry. I'm fine with everything. He and Yugi climb out into the fray. Everything is fine, isn't it?

I step out of the car. The flashing lights blind me like they always do at red carpet events. My collar sticks to the back of my neck from the heat lamps. "Journalists" flock around the duellists as they get out of the many sleek black cars when the duellist try to get to the open double doors of the sprawling castle Seto calls home. Just like always, not even a blade of grass is out of place. This has changed from the secret blimp ride of our battle city; instead this party was announced on ever news source that cared to run it.

Some woman in a tiny tight dress and curled hair crams a microphone in my face starts to ask the only question that I'll be asked today.

"So what do you think about seeing your ex boyfriend again? Neither of you have dated anyone since, are you sure you're over him?" She asks in an annoyingly breathy way that I can only assume is meant to be sexy. But instead of shoving past her like I want, I'm the good little television persona and smile like that question wasn't intrusive as all hell.

"Over him, yes. I was the one that broke up; most people don't break up unless they're over the other person. Why I haven't dated in 5 years has nothing to do with him, I'm not going to date any of my co-workers and I don't have much time to find anyone to date. Excuse me, I'm going to judge his food harshly." I say to the cartoonishly made up women in front of me with a smile, as I side step her towards the door. Unfortunately my heart pounds more rapidly every step. But why? I'm over Seto, I gave him why we broke up. I tried to give him closure and I didn't break up with him abruptly; we'd been having issues for a while before then.

He'd broken our dinner date that night, without so much as a text saying he'd be late or to not even bother he's too busy. Instead he'd sent nothing. Since we almost never saw each other at this point, I wanted to make the dinner a little special. I made his favourite, a nice steak with some vegetables in some complicated sauce or other. Then, for dessert, a very impressive dark chocolate raspberry mousse. All homemade, fresh, from scratch using the best ingredients money could buy, everything was tasty and labour intensive. It was a labour of love damn it! Instead of sharing amazing food with a person that I still loved, I was left with a cold plate and the pitying looks of the house staff. I just sat there at the kitchen breakfast counter until our private chef moved Seto's plate so that it was food safe when Seto did actually eat the stupid thing. I just looked at him carefully pack up Seto's food as if it was in slow motion. I didn't want to repair anything, I didn't want to forgive once again, and I didn't want to lie to Seto that it was OK again because dealing with his guilt was worse. It didn't feel worth it anymore.

I waited in the living room off the foyer for him to get home, drinking some loose-leaf herbal tea he got me in China two weeks prior as an apology for having business trips back to back. I'd had packed anything I really cared about, my knives mostly. It was well after 12 at night before I felt his guilt just pour into the door. Even to this day I have a thought he didn't come home earlier because he knew somehow what this time meant. I place my cup on a duel monsters theme coaster then meet him at the door.

His collared shirt was not tucked and pants were wrinkled. His hair was in disarray reviling mine on a normal day, but what my eyes drew to was the unspoken begging in his eyes. They were gorgeous blue pools of guilt, and shame.

"Joey, I'm…"He starts in the tone he always uses when he wants me to forgive him. It's a little whining, submissive, insecure. I reach into my pocket and pull out the smooth plastic keycard. Seto swallowed his words the second he saw that. My heart was shockingly calm at this moment.

"I can't do this anymore, Seto. I love you…some part of me always will. But I just can't keep giving you one more chance to not break your promises. I've stop wanting to forgive you. I know you're going to do this again, you always do, and I've stopped caring about it. I want a boyfriend, not whatever we are." I said and then couldn't seem to think of anything else that needed to be said. He jaw tightened at every word; his eyes got a distinct shine in them, he swallowed one too many times. As always his eyes are the most expressive part, his world just shattered in front of him. The reason he does so much just stopped existing. I watched the storm silently rage. I wanted to tell him I'm kidding; it was just a terrible joke. Isn't love enough? But no, it's not. A relationship is a fuck more than love, there shouldn't have been so many It's Ok's. It never was OK, not once was it OK to break a promise. He always called me too forgiving, to ready to just forget his transgressions, too good for him. But I hold my ground.

"Puppy...I'm sorry." His voice cracks. His hands start to shake and bottom lip quivers. His world was broken into tiny little piece, tiny microscopic pieces that no matter how much he tries he won't be able to repair. The only person he's completely let his guard down in front of wasn't going to be in his life anymore. But as the seconds went by, the paper-thin mask eroded and finally the dam broke. His legs gave out and, a terrible sound that I've only hear once before, his sobs echoed though the foyer. Most people would have left, but our relationship wasn't most people's.

I wrap my arms around his slightly too thin frame. Then I pulled him close, stroking his hair. He grabs onto my sweater. I couldn't leave him like that. He was too fragile to leave him alone.

"Please Puppy, please reconsider…please. I get you're point…I get that you're not happy. But is breaking up really necessary? Can't we make this work?" He begged. I couldn't call it pathetic that would throw everything we've gone through in his face. But I could call it desperate.

"No, Seto. I love you, but…I just can't stand around and get hurt every three weeks like clockwork. I can't just keeping forgiving you for breaking promises that were never ok to break to begin with…how can I have a relationship with you when I don't see you for a week at a time even when you're in town. You've never had time for me, but I stuck around because the time you set aside was amazing. When we did spend time together...I wouldn't ask for anyone else. But I've told you countless number of times, there is a lot more to a relationship than love." My voice cracked at the end and then I felt wetness roll down my face. I did care about him, I knew him well enough to know how much this would destroy him.

"But…" He started; the rest got gargled in sobs. 6 amazing years, why was it that time he forgot, or just didn't show up, that I decided that I had enough. Why that night? I still can't answer that; just something clicked that night that I didn't want to that anymore. I didn't want to give excuses why my boyfriend couldn't be here, explain that I had give him a month to clear his schedule for a night out. Tears streamed out my eyes. My chest hurt like a 400-degree oil burn when I listened to Seto weep in my arms that night. Six years, we'd been to hell and back for the other.

After a while his sobs retreated, and his hands relaxed from clutching my sweater. All the while, I run my fingers through his silky hair.

"Seto, it's time for bed." I said barely above a whisper. He, luckily, realized that arguing with me wasn't worth the little amount of energy he had left. We walked through the house peppered with vacation pictures of Mokuba, Serenity, Seto and I. Disney, NASA, Eifel Tower, KaibaLand openings and so many duelling tournaments that it is just silly we kept the pictures. A few trophies behind glass cases, my first magazine cover for my food, he bragged about me better than he bragged about himself.

We got to the master bedroom, and it felt too clean for me. All the clothing that I'd thrown on the floor that morning, I had packed.

"Go brush your teeth." I ordered then I took a clean pair of almost 100 silk pyjamas out of his walk-in closet. The many suits, slacks, ties and cuff links that he bought for me for dinner parties he hosted hung in pristine rows on the left side of the closet.

I handed him his pyjama and watched him get changed. His ribs were obvious behind the build muscle. He climbed into one side of the massive king bed, his side. I just took a seat on edge with my feet on buried in the heated Turkish rug.

"Joey...don't try to pay me back for any money I've given you for your restaurants. Just for once don't argue. And I won't keep too close of tabs on you." He said. I smiled at his order.

"Ok, I won't argue for once. I assumed you would anyway; you're way too overprotective to just let go. But Seto you know very well my businesses are doing great, and you really don't need to worry that I'll end up homeless." I said as I pulled his hair out of his eyes.

"Answer me this as honestly as you'll allow yourself…"he started. I sighed knowing exactly what question he was going to ask.

"No, the answer is just no. Six years and you don't believe me. You're an amazing boyfriend that doesn't have 28-hour days, you always were. I got annoyed at your criticisms…but once I realized that they almost always had nothing to do with me, I couldn't get too mad…I can't take Jou until I've bought a place." I said to Seto whose eyelids were half closed already.

"Better lawyer up then." He slightly slurred his words.

"You're really going to take me court over a cat that you didn't even want in the first place? Unfortunately for me, you're serious but I know you'll him treat well. Remember he doesn't eat cat food. Take care of yourself; I don't want to read that you're in the hospital from over work." I got off the bed and turned off the lights. Right before closing the door of his bedroom, I heard a very small "Thank you."

"Now go to sleep." Then I just closed the door, went to pet Jou for the last time, hugged his chubby fluffy body way too close, and finally went over to Yugi's house for the night.


	2. Chapter 2

I pass through the door into the location I broke up, and it hasn't changed much since that night. Everything is polished; the marble floor waxed to a shine, but the door to one of the living rooms is closed from the public. The 4-foot crystal chandelier sparkles overheard. A "Battle Ox" stands in the entrance of the grand staircase, I smile to myself at Seto's very appropriate do not enter signs. Then I turn into the party. Silent waiters weave between duelists in t-shirts, business people in suits and a very sparse sprinkling of photographers mill around. Ryou and Bakura have met up with Yugi and Yami already. Yami and Bakura are already arguing about god knows what in Arabic. More than likely politics. Yugi and Ryou seem to be trying to talk their significant others down.

I start to feel eyes bore into me, that irritating, but adorable, smirk, and hear foot steps with only the highest quality leather. Out from the throng of people steps Seto, in a bespoke wool suit, unchanged and manicured as his house. In his hands he holds two glasses of something bubbly and, in his eyes amused indifference at my presence. I should be feeling panic right now. Instead my heart has calmed down at the sight of him. My palms don't sweat. This night will be fine.

"Non-alcoholic, from what I've read you still outsource your wine selections." He says offering me one of the glasses of bubbling white grape juice in a fancy champagne flute. That makes it sound like he read it in a magazine somewhere, and not like he doesn't know where I am almost everyday of the year. I take a sip of the sweet liquid.

"Did you expect me to change?" I ask.

"No, I'm glad that you haven't changed in that respect. I also hope that your tastes haven't substantially changed either. You might recognize a few dishes that are served." He says, then takes a sip of what looks like white grape juice too.

"I loved Salmon a la mode personally. But Jou always looked too cute not to feed." I say without thinking. The corners of his mouth ever so slightly upturn, but quickly get rained in. The many ridiculous conversations I had over the years with him, of course he won't let himself smile around other people.

"That has been getting him feed for the past 9 years, but his persistent meowing doesn't hurt." Seto says in polite jest. So Jou is still alive, not that I thought that Seto would murder our cat but it is nice to know.

"I disagree. It hurt my ears to hear him meowing. I never quite understood how such a tiny body could make such a loud sound. It was always a bit of a _cat_ astrophe." He just glares playfully at me for the low hanging fruit of humour.

"I'm just going to nip this pun-train before it begins. I know how long you can go." He says but I can feel the suppressed amused eye roll and I smile at his pun. Then some middle-aged man in a collared shirt and jeans comes up behind Seto.

"You still pounced on the opportunity though and since you didn't _bark_ at me, you must be a good mood. Also I had to make the required dog pun." I tease before walking back into the crowd of people towards the many piles of food on the side in a long row of tables with white table clothes. Dishes of every ilk with mostly silent waiters serving them up, desserts, snacks, and drinks. I walk up the tables, but stop at the table saying "Dark Chocolate Mouse with Raspberry" in fancy cursive writing. Seto, you had to, you just had to. Also it took me way too short to get comfortable again just, as they say, shooting the shit with Seto. It should be awkward or stilted to talk to my ex-lover. Instead we go back to annoying each other in harmless ways, amusing the other like 5 years didn't pass. Unrelated to that, he seemed quite content. Or I should say, the fact that he'll talk about almost nothing with me normally means he pretty happy. I go to grab one of the small cups of mouse, but my hand bumps against someone else's.

"Sorry", I say reflexively, but then look up at a much more mature Mokuba Kaiba. The long black hair down past his waist is now a slightly more conservative shoulder length but dyed bright red and blue with neon green half moon gauges in both ears. In defiance from his brother, the CTO of Kaiba corp wears a graphic t-shirt with the god cards on it and jeans with a massive hole in the knee. If it wasn't obvious he didn't want to be confused with his brother, he has a fully done sleeve on his left arm. But one thing hasn't changed, a need to protect his brother. The second he realized that I had the gale to come; his eyes narrow slightly.

"Joey, glad you could make it." He says in a way only a businessman can. He's grown in the past 5 years, which includes his ability to lie. But I gave him a smile anyway.

"Seto said that I might recognize a few of the dishes, and I hope that this is one of them. Personally I think I make a really nice chocolate raspberry mouse. " I say taking a cup of mousse from the table and then taking a bite of the exact same mousse I ate 5 years ago in that empty kitchen.

"You always did. There is a reason that you're opening a new restaurant in New York in 6 months, opening night filled already?" He asks, also taking a cup of mousse.

"Yes, unfortunately for you. You've moved out of here into a downtown apartment right?" I say finishing off the mousse.

"Yes, a nice one bedroom very close to the Kaiba Building. I moved out 4 years ago to go to college at DU. Pretty much what people expected of me." He shrugs. What people expected wasn't a tattooed, punk rocker from a brother worshiping little kid. But that really isn't my place to correct him. Then his watch buzzes. He quickly glances at screen.

"Sorry, problems in catering. I'll catch up with you later." He says before just leaving me to go back to harshly judging Seto's catering services. When he used mine, we never had a problem.

I eat a few more bite sized, beautifully constructed desserts. The mousse is fluffy like mine, the cream puffs are not overly sweet, and everything just tastes familiar. I don't bake extensive, time-consuming desserts for just myself that much. I used to bake them when Seto cancelled on me. I was home; I had someone that needed to eat more. Plus any frustration I had about the fact that he just cancelled on me for the second time in a row normally dissipated when I could shove a sweet dessert in his face the second he walked in the door and watch the stress of the day dissolve. Then a very apologetic kiss and an act that can only be described as love making. It wasn't the rough frenzied race against our plummeting energy levels to get off. Instead Seto worshiped every inch of my body, bite, kissed, nipped in the places he knew I loved. Where the only place I wanted to ever be was in his bed, under him, moaning his name while he whispered sweet words into my those nights…the highs he gave me probably made me stay in the relationship vastly longer than I should have. I don't have anyone to compare it to, yes, 27 and I've only ever been with one man. But from my polling my friends, you just know what good sex feels like.

I can't say I've tried having sex with anyone else, but I've tried getting sexual with other people. I've kissed a few, but their hands on me, tongue in my mouth always just felt weird to me. I never wanted to go farther than that with anyone but Seto. It just clicked somehow when we first kissed.

We'd been dating for two weeks when I first kissed him. I was over at his house on Friday night after a long day at work. In my case, as a waiter at some sort-of sketchy restaurant near my father's apartment and Seto dealt with the standard bullshit all week. His arm was around me when we watched Netflix while I laid my head on his chest and watched him fall asleep. I was still a little hesitant to fully believe that the person who insulted me for two years wanted me in his house, his arms even if he explained to me why. Not because I didn't want to at this point. I highly enjoyed his attention; it was something good to concentrate on when my father fell off the wagon around this time.

The episode of the police procedural ended and, Seto paused it to go grab a blanket from the corner. Even if he was gone for only 30 seconds I missed his body against mine, but soon enough I was comfortably cuddling with him again. I reached to start the next episode, but he stops me. I looked at him waiting. He took a breath before starting.

"I have a business trip next week to America that will last five or six days. Depends how agreeable they are."

I hug him a little tighter but unknown to him at this point, I was a little more upset by the idea of going home for the weekend than not getting to see him. Not that the gang wouldn't want to hang out, but since the gang paired off sleepovers weren't a thing anymore. Understandably so.

"Promise you'll message me?" I asked. His lips curved up and he ran his fingers through my hair.

"Multiple times daily if you don't mind, and thank you for not making a big deal out of it. Because, I know this is a little early and you can tell me stop at any point, I'll do this a lot. I'm the CEO of an international corporation…" He was adorably flustered trying to find the right words to say. I even saw a little red in his cheeks.

"Which means you work a lot, and have a lot on your plate. You also have a little brother to parent. We're going to deal with issues that my friends won't be able to relate to…I sort of guessed that. But I want to know where this goes." I said, meaning every word. Seto smiled, a smile that shone in his eyes. Throughout our relationship, I was sort of addicted to that smile.

"May I kiss you?" I asked before I realized and then my face started to heat up from just how juvenile that sounded.

"I was wondering when you'd ask." He teased, his lips in an annoying smirk at my question. My heart sped up by the second as I straddled him; his hands ran down my thigh and pulled me toward him. He and I were already in our pyjamas that didn't hide a damn thing, and I don't really know why I was a little shocked to find him tented already. Which must have shown in my face.

"I'm not about to hide my attraction or my excitement at the thought of kissing you, but you choose what you want to do with it. As much as, one day I do expect you to get very well acquainted. I will happily return service." Such a Seto Kaiba thing to say, unapologetically honest. Images of him naked with me between his legs kissing my way up towards his cock, his musk filling my nose, a small bead of pre-cum on the tip ready to be tasted raced into my head. Of course my cheeks heated up even more and my erection was obvious on his thigh. I would have expected myself to be immune from blushing at sex; it wasn't like my father hide anything from me, but when it was happening to me I couldn't help myself.

"You don't seem too adverse to the idea." Seto teased in his adorable way of teasing me.

I had nothing to say to that, mostly since it was true, so I crushed our lips together. I expected my first kiss to be soft, gentle maybe in a field of flowers or in a nice restaurant. That wouldn't describe this kiss in any way what so ever. Instead Seto kissed back with just as much energy. His lips bruised mine. One hand caressed my thigh and the other combed through my hair, pulling slightly. The slight pain from my scalp sent shivers down my spine in pleasure and my entire body ignited. I craved this feeling even if I had never felt it before, his kiss always felt right. Not to mention the hardening of my penis at ever change in pressure. He dragged his tongue along my bottom lip asking for permission, which I gave enthusiastically. The second our tongues touched my head went from a low hormonal buzz to full drunk on my new boyfriend's kiss and any doubts that this was a very sick joke by Seto Kaiba dissolved. He explored my mouth, wanting to know everything for future reference. I explored his, tasted the flavour I'd chase for six years. But everyone needs air. We broke the kiss, panting and his grip on my hair loosened. I opened my eyes to a massive smile on Seto and slightly swollen lips from the intensity of our kiss. I laid my forehead on his shoulder trying to get my head on straight. I had to get my head around that kiss as much as I didn't feel like it should have been a big deal. But it was. Now I can explain it was mostly that I wasn't perfectly OK with being gay. I felt slightly embarrassed and maybe a little dirty that I liked kissing another male.

Then I felt fingers run through my hair in a move that Seto soon learned I loved more than I should. But we still had the obvious issue that both us would be in a sorry fix very soon if we didn't take care of our sexual needs. My issue was that letting Seto see me naked would have brought up questions that I wasn't comfortable answering quite yet. At this point I wasn't quite sure if I was going to let this get that far, I got with Seto slightly because I needed a place to be on weekends.

"Shall we reconvene in about 20 minutes? Unless I'm in for a real treat before my long tough business trip." He asked, still a little out of breath. I straightened to face him and slightly glared at the last part.

"Guilt tripping isn't going to work to get me to touch your cock, so don't even try. " I said as I got off of him to go take care of our situation, but with a smile I hide badly. He laughed at my response.

"Still not going to apologize for my desire. I have a gorgeous teenager in my arms, kissing me, it was too tempting not to, at least, ask." He said so unapologetically with a look in eyes that dared me to challenge him. But I was more concentrating on the second sentence. It just didn't sit right being called gorgeous, not that it came up often back then but I learned that not being able to take a compliment sends up red flags. So I pushed that thought to the back of my mind.

"And I'm saying not quite yet. I'm just not comfortable yet. I know it can't be too much different, but…" I started to just babble an explanation without looking like a prude. The challenge in his eyes turned to concern the more I 'explained' my position. I sobered up and shut up after that.

"Joey, we just had our first kiss. I'm not expecting you to suddenly jump into bed with me tonight. Hell, I don't even know if I'd be comfortable to go through with that. It was supposed to be harmless flirting, not make you uncomfortable or give the impression that I expected you to anything you're not completely comfortable with." He explained and slight apology wrapped into one. I crawled back into his arms, as a non-verbal way of saying, "don't worry about it". He pulled me against him; kissed me with a chaste kiss, both of us had sobered up by this point, and put on the next episode of the police procedural.


End file.
